The Difference Between Compassion and Pity:
Volunteering after Japan’s Earthquake & Tsunami (Part 2)
New York, N.Y. During my stay in the disaster area, I had been praying for the Dalai Lama to come to Japan. To my surprise, when I returned to Tokyo, he arrived to Japan on April 29th, the most important day in Buddhism. On this day a special memorial service was held in Tokyo and I was delighted to thank him personally.
I wonder how lucky I was to be able to do this. There is always something to be done in a disaster area, so I acted with compassion. My mentor, Masahiro Oki, said, “If you don’t know what to do, it’s not volunteering. Find out what you have to do and take action immediately. This is real volunteering.” Caring volunteers must work with their full heart and understand what is needed, to serve unconditionally with a heart of mercy.
During these experiences, I was never saddened. But I was truly moved by the remarkable character of the Japanese people, their spirit of caring for others, and their spirit of helping each other. These attributes moved me to tears. I saw the Dalai Lama’s word, “Others rather than self” actually unfolding.
There was no looting, no one took advantage, and they simply helped each other. On TV, a boy with his last little milk carton saw a young mother holding her baby in the distance. He ran to her and offered his milk. Everyone was sharing small rice balls and water. They gave their food to the children who in turn even shared it with other children.
This character of the Japanese is remarkable. In today’s society full of modern self-assertion, I thought perhaps this wonderful nature had been lost a long time ago. This original character returned and I was very proud to be Japanese. This is the most remarkable thing the disaster brought to Japan. We were able to recover from the devastation of World War II because this character was deeply rooted in us. At that time, Tokyo and Osaka had been completely destroyed, but recovered in less than eight years.
When we went to Ishinomaki, the road was blocked with rubble piled high like a mountain on both sides of the road. A ship was on top of a building and cars were piled up high. In the middle, incredibly houses were piled up on houses. The narrow road was cleared somewhat so that the special Self-Defense Force rescue vehicles could pass.
Having witnessed several years before the dire situation in New Orleans and Haiti, I was surprised at the speed of this recovery. By the time I came back to New York, almost 5,000 new homes had already been built, and the government was desperately looking for more land. I was very impressed with the Japanese people.
We don’t know what will happen to nuclear power plants in Fukushima and those who had been evacuated. Perhaps Japan will not have nuclear power in the future. There is a wealth of natural energy there, such as geothermal energy and typhoon power. They say one day we will be able to harness the power of gigantic tsunami waves, but maybe this is too exaggerated.
Conclusion
Compassion and Pity
Compassion is understanding a person and empathizing with his pain and unhappiness. This is not the same as feeling pity for others. Feeling pity is a negative emotion; compassion is a positive emotion. Compassion equates yourself with others and is close to the feelings of others. Feeling pity for others they don’t share their feelings and become outsiders.
Compassion also has a very important element. It’s not just sympathy, it’s about wanting to do something. The key word is action. A strong urge to do something for another is real compassion. It is a feeling of pity to feel sorry for others and do nothing. You have placed yourself with the other. Compassion leads to unconditional service. Pity places you above the person, compassion makes you equal.
The Strength of Unity in Disaster
“One for All and All for One” was an important dictate that helped me many during disasters when I acted on my own without hesitation.
There is a famous samurai anecdote, “The Teachings of Miya.” Mori Motokami, the sengoku daimyo, gathered his three sons and broke three arrows at a time. Then, he asked them to fold three arrows at the same time, but they couldn’t. He said, “If the three of us work together, we will be stronger than each one.” I’m sure you’ll be able to get through everything.
With deep gratitude and compassion and love.
Originally published as Vol. 113 in Weekly Biz, May 16, 2020; translated by Jim Luce.
See: Dr. Kazuko Hillyer Tatsumura Column in Japan’s Weekly Biz
(ニューヨークビズ！)
Dr. Kazuko, Gaia Holistic Foundation, Japan, Japanese essay, Kazuko Hillyer Tatsumura
